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ankhTitle: Never Alone
Author: Ankh
Archived: http://bunnyfic.com/Ankh/Never_Alone.htm
Category: H/C
Spoilers: season 1 episode 'The Broca Divide'.
Rating: PG-13
Summary: What happened during and after Broca Divide?
Date: 2002
Author Notes: Liberties were taken with certain events in the episode in the original zine version of this fic. Fraiser doesn't discover lack of histamine until after Teal'c returns with the blood sample, which means Daniel wouldn't know why he was changing. I've changed it because, well, it was annoying me. :-)
Disclaimer: Neither SG1 nor any of the characters are mine. You all know who they belong to. I've borrowed them, without permission, and feel no remorse whatsoever. Of course I'm not making any money from this. Please don't archive without my permission.
There was a lot to be said for thousands of years of development; the ability to communicate in something other than grunts for one. Since he had been dragged away from Teal'c and brought here among the Touched, Daniel had been prodded, kicked, howled at and generally roughed up. At least homo sapiens could ... Actually, come to think of it, maybe the only difference was that modern man did all those things while using words Daniel could translate. It made a big difference. At least then there was the possibility of communication, of making a connection that didn't consist entirely of flesh striking flesh.
He was way out of his depth here.
Daniel had known bullies while he was growing up, had briefly had a spell of being a victim until one day he simply had enough and whacked his tormentor with several volumes of The Rise and Fall of the Roman Empire. The bullying had consisted of taunting, of books tossed into puddles, the odd shove into a wall here and there that had been more of a nuisance than something that would scar him in any way.
Intellectually, he knew the right things to do. He knew how to react, had read the right books as part of his research into other cultures, knew all about unthreatening posture, submissive body language, of how to stay alive and be accepted.
What he didn't know was what it felt like to be on the receiving end of a beating that was supposed to show him who was boss, nor had it spelled out loud and clear that if he didn't learn fast he would die.
The woman, Melosha, was crouched a short distance away. He could feel her watching him; once he had felt her touching his face, perhaps curious about the way his face was different from those of the other males. She had changed into one of the Touched quickly, the changes completed shortly after they had reached the camp. The group had left her while the process was taking place, not remotely unsettled by her cries as her body changed. He wasn't sure why they had continued to leave her alone though he had noticed an odour coming from her that was growing stronger – or his senses were growing sharper. He suspected what he was smelling was blood, that Melosha was menstruating, and that seemed to be enough to keep the males in the group from attempting to take her. He tried not to think about what would happen to her, hoped that when the Touched tried to take her that she would be willing, that this was not a society that raped its own females, that she had been considered fair game before she had been carried off and now appeared to have been accepted within the group. Before he'd learned of the Touched, when they had first stumbled upon the group, he had tried to keep his distance, spouting the words of a scientist; even as he had he had hoped that someone, that Jack, would overrule him so he could ignore scientific scruples and prevent what his heart told him was rape while his logic told him it was another culture and they had no right to interfere. When he and Teal'c had returned to this place and found Melosha lying on the ground, he could no more have left her there than he could have left Sam. Now Melosha was one of them.
He could hear the Touched moving around the camp behind him. He was about twenty feet away, not far from the safety of the forest. Melosha appeared to have wandered off. If he could get up unnoticed and head deep into the trees perhaps he could lose them. Of course, he'd probably lose himself, too. The whole damn forest was black as night and with his luck he'd wind up breaking his neck trying to escape. There was also the fact the Touched probably had excellent night vision and he was willing to bet their senses were a lot sharper than his. Still, anything was better than waiting for them to decide what to do with him. Already he was starting to feel…not quite right.
He had tried curling in on himself, tried to become smaller, less noticeable. It hadn't worked. Periodically, they would come over and kick him, perhaps to keep him in his place and his body now felt like one massive bruise. More terrifying, he was finding it increasingly difficult to think clearly. He had tried to mentally run through the various texts he had read on Human evolution, trying to narrow down the possibilities, aware the Touched displayed physical characteristics of several hominid types, but he was increasingly aware that he was finding it harder to remember, harder to think in terms of words.
No doubt the Touched were used to this routine, knew what Daniel knew. Time to face facts. With things as hectic as they were at the SGC, rescue was unlikely. He was about to become one of them. He could feel it. He knew what would come next. Like Jack, like Sam and others on the base his body would begin to change. He could feel it happening already. His mind, that mind he valued, that mind that others valued, was growing sluggish, thoughts becoming cloudy. Conversely his senses had never been sharper, smells and sounds easily distinguished and catalogued, though he found he was assessing them for their threat rather than their interest.
He would have to make a break for it.
Maybe it was already too late?
Daniel began to uncurl, resisting the urge to simply race for the sanctuary of the forest, knowing these 'primitives' could out run him on their own territory. His heart pounding, he tried to rise silently, please, just a little luck, a little care and he was so close...
He knew the second his attempt at escape had been spotted. The growls sent fear lancing through him and he was wincing even before the first blows landed. Powerful fists pounded against his flesh and he grunted with the pain, trying to become small again, unthreatening so the group leader would leave him alone. When the punishment finally stopped he was dropped back onto the ground. Curling in on himself, he tried to contain the pain, to make it more bearable. He needed to get away, couldn't do this alone, needed Jack...
Pain swept through him but it had little to do with bruised flesh. God, Jack... An unwelcome picture formed, his last sight of Jack, his face almost unrecognisable as the virus altered its structure. He had been in so much pain, yet in his eyes there had still been some semblance of Jack O'Neill, friend and sometimes major pain in the ass, fighting to get out, to reassert itself. He'd lost Jack. This was how it ended: Daniel's fate in the hands of the Touched, his search for Sha're ending here before it had truly begun, and the one person who actually gave a damn about Daniel's vow to save his wife, the one person who had got to know Daniel Jackson and knew Sha're and what she meant to Daniel, the person he called friend, was locked away in a cell, his quick mind and ready wit lost to some alien virus.
The same was happening to Sam, had happened, that bright intelligence he had come to admire dimmed, her personality, something Daniel had barely known but had looked forward to coming to know, lost.
That would be Daniel's fate.
As for Teal'c… The Touched had been carrying something big and heavy when they had arrived at the camp, something that he couldn't identify in the darkness but had left a large trail of blood. Whatever it was, they had been eating it for hours, fighting over the choicest pieces. Add 'carnivore' to his information about this species and he hoped to God he was wrong about that which he feared had happened to the alien warrior he had tried to hate but almost unwillingly come to regard as a friend.
Regret, a sense of failure, swamped him. He was afraid, for his friends and his planet. Would the virus spread or would they contain it by destroying SGC? Could they do anything else?
He would never know because he was going to become one of the Touched. This was his future.
It couldn't end like this. People like him didn't die on alien planets. People like Jack and Sam didn't suffer unheroic deaths because they stumbled upon an alien virus, or end up at Area 51. He just had to think, plan...but it was so hard thinking, so hard...
***
Dark?
Daniel blinked, confirming that he did indeed have his eyes open. Night? He was outdoors, could feel a cool breeze caressing his face, gentle against flesh that was throbbing spasmodically. The breeze reached other bared flesh, stirring torn fabric and the hairs on his thigh and calf. His brain felt like it was covered in molasses, thoughts fighting to surface, the sense of words trying to form rather than sentences trying to link to form some sort of lucid mental reasoning that would explain where he was, why he was and what the hell was happening to him?
Sounds behind him made him freeze, fledgling thoughts swept aside as basic emotion took over. Not alone. Others... There had been a woman, little more than a girl. She had needed help, had been left, was unclaimed...unclaimed females could be taken if the dominant male...
No. Not right. Unclaimed? Abandoned but... It was so difficult thinking and the sounds behind him were intruding, beginning to make sense.
Go. Leave. He needed to break free but he hurt so much and this wasn't supposed to happen. He was... a scientist, an observer...observing... He was... Daniel. Needed to get away.
Something inside him was growing and, oh god, hurt, it hurt. His skull felt like it was trying to split through the skin covering it. Pain tore through him, ripping him apart from the inside, a horrifying sense of bones stretching, of flesh shifting. Daniel gasped, trying to keep silent, knowing that movement would attract attention, remembering that it had happened before and punishment for daring to move from his place had been swift. It felt like...bone swelling, skin stretching. He cried out, unable to stifle the sounds.
Behind Daniel the 'Untouched' began to howl.
***
Voices. He could hear familiar voices, speaking actual words, voices that reached into him, calming him, so soothing. He needed reassurance, needed to know that it wasn't some dream, that maybe *all* of it *had* been a dream, that it was all OK, and the person who could do that was...
"Jack."
The hands touching him were big, gentle, as soothing as the words. Oh, thank God, not alone, not alone...
There was more talking, other voices joining the conversation that were less familiar, not so soothing, but not unknown. He wasn't sure how long it was - minutes? Hours? - before they were outside in bright sunshine. The pain had almost completely faded, at least the pain the transformation had caused. His ribs were aching but that was from the beating he'd undergone, not the stretching of bone and shifting of flesh.
Jack was saying something to Carter, something that was clearly a joke though one which he was unable to follow. It was hard enough trying to put one foot in front of the other without wondering about Sam's "sweet little tank top number". He slid a look at Sam, who seemed torn between annoyance and amusement. Amusement seemed to be winning. She realized he was watching her and her smile altered, a warmth in her eyes that was comforting. She matched her pace to his, a hand touching him on the back, her eyes asking a question. Yes, he was fine. He really was. He sensed another presence on his other side and looked to see who it was. Teal'c was looking straight ahead, ever the warrior, incredibly comforting to have beside him, despite their history. He wondered why that was but cast aside the thought when his head began to pound. Another day for such thoughts. Or maybe not. Perhaps some things shouldn't be analyzed too much, just accepted as is.
There was already far too much to think about of today's events without contemplating the past. Melosha. He remembered she had been beside him much of the time, her body pressed up against his side as they ate. She had been the first to go to him when the pain stopped, he knew that much. His thoughts, such as they were, had been of sight and sound, scent and taste, how the heat of her body at his side comforted him. He remembered being afraid and she had stroked his face, his hands, his arm, crooning to him. He hoped his memory wasn't playing him false, that she truly hadn't been raped by himself or the others. He hadn't been a dominant male, the bruises on his body attested to the fact he had been kept 'in his place' by the others; but Melosha had been permitted to remain at his side despite being the only female he saw.
The sound of the gate activating cut across his thoughts. Daniel saw Sam look across at Jack, eyebrows raised, then Jack nod at Teal'c but he was too tired to wonder what he had missed. His head lowering, too busy trying to stay upright, Daniel didn't catch the murmured exchange that followed, but the result was that both Teal'c and Sam stepped through first.
Leaving Jack with Daniel.
"Hey."
Thinking that was his cue to get moving, Daniel took a step toward the stargate.
A hand on his shoulder stopped him.
"Daniel. What happened?"
Daniel frowned, puzzled by the question and the infinitely gentle tone. "I turned primitive, Jack. Same as you."
Jack began fiddling with his sunglasses, folding the arms back and forth. His eyes darted a look at Daniel, sweeping up and down and lingering on the ripped trousers, back to the sunglasses – arms out, arms in; lens wiped across a grubby sleeve. Back and forth; a little more vigorously than was strictly necessary. Finally, seemingly content with their condition now – lenses scratched and arms in dire need of tightening - he popped the glasses into a pocket. Head tilted to one side, projecting relaxed body language, but the expression in his eyes far from casual, he asked, "What's with the torn clothes?"
Daniel looked down at himself, seeing his disarray. One hand plucking at the torn fabric barely covering his thigh, he explained, "They got a little rough. Keeping me in my place, I guess."
"Did they do anything to you that I should… You want to... uh... tell me about something?"
Jack's voice was so deceptively calm that it took a moment for the meaning to sink in and it wasn't the words that reached past the fog surrounding Daniel's brain. It was the look in Jack's eyes. There was a terrible fear there, tinged with a desperate plea that Daniel assure him that what he was afraid had happened hadn't happened at all. He wondered if he would have recognized it if Melosha hadn't been in his thoughts.
Even if anything had happened to him, Daniel wasn't sure if he could have told Jack at that moment, if ever. The man's need for reassurance was simply too great. He suspected he would have lied, told him the sky was green, just so he could take the pain away from his eyes and see that face wearing any other emotion, relief, amusement, bemusement, anything except the fear.
Thank God he didn't have to lie.
"I'm fine, Jack. Really."
Jack's gaze darted aside, drifting over plant life, his boots, the sky, before he'd managed to school his expression. Despite his best efforts, the relief was shining through. He gazed at Daniel for several long seconds, that mask of casual enquiry firmly in place - until something, perhaps the torn clothes, perhaps the bruises liberally decorating Daniel's skin, slipped past his defences. He gave a sigh, eyes closing briefly, before opening once more and fixing on Daniel, his emotions clearly visible - no masks, no hiding his feelings. His arms came up and around Daniel, surrounding him in strength and warmth, his face pressed up against Daniel's hair, releasing another sigh that tickled Daniel's ear.
"You scared the hell out of me," Jack muttered, his arms tightening a fraction before he pulled away, his smile rueful and somewhat embarrassed. He jerked his head towards the stargate and began walking toward it. "Come on before the damn thing disengages."
A small frown lodged between his eyebrows, Daniel walked beside his friend, feeling guilty about the fact he was anxious to go home. "I'll need to return. I don't think anything happened with Melosha but… Jack, I need to make sure. She was with me most of the time and I don't think anything…that I did anything…"
Jack came to an abrupt halt.
Daniel shot a look at Jack when an arm came sweeping up to stop his progress. He caught a peculiar look crossing Jack's face, something akin to self-disgust, which made Daniel wonder if something had happened to Jack.
Jack's next words were spoken softly: "You know what? If I say something that makes it pretty clear my mouth and my brain aren't connected, kick me, OK?"
Daniel raised his eyebrows and gave Jack a speaking look.
"Smart-ass."
"Sorry." Daniel watched with some concern as Jack started walking away from the stargate to sit on the steps of its platform. "Jack, we need to go before…" he trailed off, settling for waving his hand at the stargate.
"There'll be another one along in a minute."
"We don't have a GDO."
"Carter gave me the GDO."
"Why did she do that?"
"Because she's smarter than me. Daniel: sit."
Casting one final look at the event horizon, Daniel wandered over to Jack and sat down beside him. He ducked his head, busying himself with scratching at his head and wondering if the Touched carried fleas or lice.
"So…"
"So… Why did you say what you…said? Just now. About kicking you. You know. That."
Jack sighed and rubbed a hand across his head, wondering if there was some kind of insect life or plant he was allergic to. Damn if he wasn't scratching like a dog.
Daniel, you dog.
Ah hell. One of these days he was going to learn how to think before he said the first dumb thing that popped into his mouth.
"Just something I said I'd rather forget. Look. I'm taking you back home, get you checked out by the doc. As soon as she gives the OK we'll come back and check on Melosha. Right now she's with her folks and I think you should be with yours."
Daniel pulled a face. "Jack, I don't have any…"
"What am I? Chopped liver?"
"Oh. Oh!" Daniel gaped at Jack for a moment until he realized the other man was looking embarrassed, despite his best attempts to hide the fact. He closed his mouth with a snap and had to blink several times, striving for control; he hadn't realized just how close to the surface his feelings were. "Thanks, Jack."
Jack dug the toe of his right boot into the earth. "Sure. You know, it just occurred to me you were out there by yourself and you didn't have painkillers. That must have been pretty tough. You wanna talk about it?"
The sound of the wormhole disengaging broke the brief silence as Daniel seriously considered the offer. He cast aside his first thought which was to regard Jack's offer as merely a token not meant to be accepted. Jack O'Neill might like to be thought of as a hardass but the man was generous, warm and had a kindness that could make recently roughed-up archaeologists want to cry against that broad shoulder that had pressed up against his own in invitation.
Discreetly rubbing his eyes to hide his reaction but blowing it completely by giving a moist sniff, Daniel gave a smile, quick and dazzling. "Maybe later?"
"My place? I…have some apologizing to do. Over beer. I say sorry so much better if I have a beer in my hand."
Daniel scratched his head vigorously. "OK. I don't like beer that much."
"You love beer. Everyone likes beer. Come on, Danny. Let's get you home."
Jack got to his feet then put out a hand to haul up his friend. "Dial us home?"
Daniel did the honors, taking a small pleasure from the simple act of pressing the glyphs, knowing they meant a return to safety and security.
And coffee.
The wormhole burst forth, the event horizon sweeping out then stabilizing. Jack typed in the code into the GDO then looked across at his friend.
"Time to go home."
A hand reached across, ruffling Daniel's hair.
Daniel opened his mouth to voice a warning then figured it was too late and gave a Jack-like smirk.
Together, they headed toward the gate.
Not alone. Thank God, he wasn't alone.
-fin-
Author: Ankh
Archived: http://bunnyfic.com/Ankh/Never_Alone.htm
Category: H/C
Spoilers: season 1 episode 'The Broca Divide'.
Rating: PG-13
Summary: What happened during and after Broca Divide?
Date: 2002
Author Notes: Liberties were taken with certain events in the episode in the original zine version of this fic. Fraiser doesn't discover lack of histamine until after Teal'c returns with the blood sample, which means Daniel wouldn't know why he was changing. I've changed it because, well, it was annoying me. :-)
Disclaimer: Neither SG1 nor any of the characters are mine. You all know who they belong to. I've borrowed them, without permission, and feel no remorse whatsoever. Of course I'm not making any money from this. Please don't archive without my permission.
There was a lot to be said for thousands of years of development; the ability to communicate in something other than grunts for one. Since he had been dragged away from Teal'c and brought here among the Touched, Daniel had been prodded, kicked, howled at and generally roughed up. At least homo sapiens could ... Actually, come to think of it, maybe the only difference was that modern man did all those things while using words Daniel could translate. It made a big difference. At least then there was the possibility of communication, of making a connection that didn't consist entirely of flesh striking flesh.
He was way out of his depth here.
Daniel had known bullies while he was growing up, had briefly had a spell of being a victim until one day he simply had enough and whacked his tormentor with several volumes of The Rise and Fall of the Roman Empire. The bullying had consisted of taunting, of books tossed into puddles, the odd shove into a wall here and there that had been more of a nuisance than something that would scar him in any way.
Intellectually, he knew the right things to do. He knew how to react, had read the right books as part of his research into other cultures, knew all about unthreatening posture, submissive body language, of how to stay alive and be accepted.
What he didn't know was what it felt like to be on the receiving end of a beating that was supposed to show him who was boss, nor had it spelled out loud and clear that if he didn't learn fast he would die.
The woman, Melosha, was crouched a short distance away. He could feel her watching him; once he had felt her touching his face, perhaps curious about the way his face was different from those of the other males. She had changed into one of the Touched quickly, the changes completed shortly after they had reached the camp. The group had left her while the process was taking place, not remotely unsettled by her cries as her body changed. He wasn't sure why they had continued to leave her alone though he had noticed an odour coming from her that was growing stronger – or his senses were growing sharper. He suspected what he was smelling was blood, that Melosha was menstruating, and that seemed to be enough to keep the males in the group from attempting to take her. He tried not to think about what would happen to her, hoped that when the Touched tried to take her that she would be willing, that this was not a society that raped its own females, that she had been considered fair game before she had been carried off and now appeared to have been accepted within the group. Before he'd learned of the Touched, when they had first stumbled upon the group, he had tried to keep his distance, spouting the words of a scientist; even as he had he had hoped that someone, that Jack, would overrule him so he could ignore scientific scruples and prevent what his heart told him was rape while his logic told him it was another culture and they had no right to interfere. When he and Teal'c had returned to this place and found Melosha lying on the ground, he could no more have left her there than he could have left Sam. Now Melosha was one of them.
He could hear the Touched moving around the camp behind him. He was about twenty feet away, not far from the safety of the forest. Melosha appeared to have wandered off. If he could get up unnoticed and head deep into the trees perhaps he could lose them. Of course, he'd probably lose himself, too. The whole damn forest was black as night and with his luck he'd wind up breaking his neck trying to escape. There was also the fact the Touched probably had excellent night vision and he was willing to bet their senses were a lot sharper than his. Still, anything was better than waiting for them to decide what to do with him. Already he was starting to feel…not quite right.
He had tried curling in on himself, tried to become smaller, less noticeable. It hadn't worked. Periodically, they would come over and kick him, perhaps to keep him in his place and his body now felt like one massive bruise. More terrifying, he was finding it increasingly difficult to think clearly. He had tried to mentally run through the various texts he had read on Human evolution, trying to narrow down the possibilities, aware the Touched displayed physical characteristics of several hominid types, but he was increasingly aware that he was finding it harder to remember, harder to think in terms of words.
No doubt the Touched were used to this routine, knew what Daniel knew. Time to face facts. With things as hectic as they were at the SGC, rescue was unlikely. He was about to become one of them. He could feel it. He knew what would come next. Like Jack, like Sam and others on the base his body would begin to change. He could feel it happening already. His mind, that mind he valued, that mind that others valued, was growing sluggish, thoughts becoming cloudy. Conversely his senses had never been sharper, smells and sounds easily distinguished and catalogued, though he found he was assessing them for their threat rather than their interest.
He would have to make a break for it.
Maybe it was already too late?
Daniel began to uncurl, resisting the urge to simply race for the sanctuary of the forest, knowing these 'primitives' could out run him on their own territory. His heart pounding, he tried to rise silently, please, just a little luck, a little care and he was so close...
He knew the second his attempt at escape had been spotted. The growls sent fear lancing through him and he was wincing even before the first blows landed. Powerful fists pounded against his flesh and he grunted with the pain, trying to become small again, unthreatening so the group leader would leave him alone. When the punishment finally stopped he was dropped back onto the ground. Curling in on himself, he tried to contain the pain, to make it more bearable. He needed to get away, couldn't do this alone, needed Jack...
Pain swept through him but it had little to do with bruised flesh. God, Jack... An unwelcome picture formed, his last sight of Jack, his face almost unrecognisable as the virus altered its structure. He had been in so much pain, yet in his eyes there had still been some semblance of Jack O'Neill, friend and sometimes major pain in the ass, fighting to get out, to reassert itself. He'd lost Jack. This was how it ended: Daniel's fate in the hands of the Touched, his search for Sha're ending here before it had truly begun, and the one person who actually gave a damn about Daniel's vow to save his wife, the one person who had got to know Daniel Jackson and knew Sha're and what she meant to Daniel, the person he called friend, was locked away in a cell, his quick mind and ready wit lost to some alien virus.
The same was happening to Sam, had happened, that bright intelligence he had come to admire dimmed, her personality, something Daniel had barely known but had looked forward to coming to know, lost.
That would be Daniel's fate.
As for Teal'c… The Touched had been carrying something big and heavy when they had arrived at the camp, something that he couldn't identify in the darkness but had left a large trail of blood. Whatever it was, they had been eating it for hours, fighting over the choicest pieces. Add 'carnivore' to his information about this species and he hoped to God he was wrong about that which he feared had happened to the alien warrior he had tried to hate but almost unwillingly come to regard as a friend.
Regret, a sense of failure, swamped him. He was afraid, for his friends and his planet. Would the virus spread or would they contain it by destroying SGC? Could they do anything else?
He would never know because he was going to become one of the Touched. This was his future.
It couldn't end like this. People like him didn't die on alien planets. People like Jack and Sam didn't suffer unheroic deaths because they stumbled upon an alien virus, or end up at Area 51. He just had to think, plan...but it was so hard thinking, so hard...
***
Dark?
Daniel blinked, confirming that he did indeed have his eyes open. Night? He was outdoors, could feel a cool breeze caressing his face, gentle against flesh that was throbbing spasmodically. The breeze reached other bared flesh, stirring torn fabric and the hairs on his thigh and calf. His brain felt like it was covered in molasses, thoughts fighting to surface, the sense of words trying to form rather than sentences trying to link to form some sort of lucid mental reasoning that would explain where he was, why he was and what the hell was happening to him?
Sounds behind him made him freeze, fledgling thoughts swept aside as basic emotion took over. Not alone. Others... There had been a woman, little more than a girl. She had needed help, had been left, was unclaimed...unclaimed females could be taken if the dominant male...
No. Not right. Unclaimed? Abandoned but... It was so difficult thinking and the sounds behind him were intruding, beginning to make sense.
Go. Leave. He needed to break free but he hurt so much and this wasn't supposed to happen. He was... a scientist, an observer...observing... He was... Daniel. Needed to get away.
Something inside him was growing and, oh god, hurt, it hurt. His skull felt like it was trying to split through the skin covering it. Pain tore through him, ripping him apart from the inside, a horrifying sense of bones stretching, of flesh shifting. Daniel gasped, trying to keep silent, knowing that movement would attract attention, remembering that it had happened before and punishment for daring to move from his place had been swift. It felt like...bone swelling, skin stretching. He cried out, unable to stifle the sounds.
Behind Daniel the 'Untouched' began to howl.
***
Voices. He could hear familiar voices, speaking actual words, voices that reached into him, calming him, so soothing. He needed reassurance, needed to know that it wasn't some dream, that maybe *all* of it *had* been a dream, that it was all OK, and the person who could do that was...
"Jack."
The hands touching him were big, gentle, as soothing as the words. Oh, thank God, not alone, not alone...
There was more talking, other voices joining the conversation that were less familiar, not so soothing, but not unknown. He wasn't sure how long it was - minutes? Hours? - before they were outside in bright sunshine. The pain had almost completely faded, at least the pain the transformation had caused. His ribs were aching but that was from the beating he'd undergone, not the stretching of bone and shifting of flesh.
Jack was saying something to Carter, something that was clearly a joke though one which he was unable to follow. It was hard enough trying to put one foot in front of the other without wondering about Sam's "sweet little tank top number". He slid a look at Sam, who seemed torn between annoyance and amusement. Amusement seemed to be winning. She realized he was watching her and her smile altered, a warmth in her eyes that was comforting. She matched her pace to his, a hand touching him on the back, her eyes asking a question. Yes, he was fine. He really was. He sensed another presence on his other side and looked to see who it was. Teal'c was looking straight ahead, ever the warrior, incredibly comforting to have beside him, despite their history. He wondered why that was but cast aside the thought when his head began to pound. Another day for such thoughts. Or maybe not. Perhaps some things shouldn't be analyzed too much, just accepted as is.
There was already far too much to think about of today's events without contemplating the past. Melosha. He remembered she had been beside him much of the time, her body pressed up against his side as they ate. She had been the first to go to him when the pain stopped, he knew that much. His thoughts, such as they were, had been of sight and sound, scent and taste, how the heat of her body at his side comforted him. He remembered being afraid and she had stroked his face, his hands, his arm, crooning to him. He hoped his memory wasn't playing him false, that she truly hadn't been raped by himself or the others. He hadn't been a dominant male, the bruises on his body attested to the fact he had been kept 'in his place' by the others; but Melosha had been permitted to remain at his side despite being the only female he saw.
The sound of the gate activating cut across his thoughts. Daniel saw Sam look across at Jack, eyebrows raised, then Jack nod at Teal'c but he was too tired to wonder what he had missed. His head lowering, too busy trying to stay upright, Daniel didn't catch the murmured exchange that followed, but the result was that both Teal'c and Sam stepped through first.
Leaving Jack with Daniel.
"Hey."
Thinking that was his cue to get moving, Daniel took a step toward the stargate.
A hand on his shoulder stopped him.
"Daniel. What happened?"
Daniel frowned, puzzled by the question and the infinitely gentle tone. "I turned primitive, Jack. Same as you."
Jack began fiddling with his sunglasses, folding the arms back and forth. His eyes darted a look at Daniel, sweeping up and down and lingering on the ripped trousers, back to the sunglasses – arms out, arms in; lens wiped across a grubby sleeve. Back and forth; a little more vigorously than was strictly necessary. Finally, seemingly content with their condition now – lenses scratched and arms in dire need of tightening - he popped the glasses into a pocket. Head tilted to one side, projecting relaxed body language, but the expression in his eyes far from casual, he asked, "What's with the torn clothes?"
Daniel looked down at himself, seeing his disarray. One hand plucking at the torn fabric barely covering his thigh, he explained, "They got a little rough. Keeping me in my place, I guess."
"Did they do anything to you that I should… You want to... uh... tell me about something?"
Jack's voice was so deceptively calm that it took a moment for the meaning to sink in and it wasn't the words that reached past the fog surrounding Daniel's brain. It was the look in Jack's eyes. There was a terrible fear there, tinged with a desperate plea that Daniel assure him that what he was afraid had happened hadn't happened at all. He wondered if he would have recognized it if Melosha hadn't been in his thoughts.
Even if anything had happened to him, Daniel wasn't sure if he could have told Jack at that moment, if ever. The man's need for reassurance was simply too great. He suspected he would have lied, told him the sky was green, just so he could take the pain away from his eyes and see that face wearing any other emotion, relief, amusement, bemusement, anything except the fear.
Thank God he didn't have to lie.
"I'm fine, Jack. Really."
Jack's gaze darted aside, drifting over plant life, his boots, the sky, before he'd managed to school his expression. Despite his best efforts, the relief was shining through. He gazed at Daniel for several long seconds, that mask of casual enquiry firmly in place - until something, perhaps the torn clothes, perhaps the bruises liberally decorating Daniel's skin, slipped past his defences. He gave a sigh, eyes closing briefly, before opening once more and fixing on Daniel, his emotions clearly visible - no masks, no hiding his feelings. His arms came up and around Daniel, surrounding him in strength and warmth, his face pressed up against Daniel's hair, releasing another sigh that tickled Daniel's ear.
"You scared the hell out of me," Jack muttered, his arms tightening a fraction before he pulled away, his smile rueful and somewhat embarrassed. He jerked his head towards the stargate and began walking toward it. "Come on before the damn thing disengages."
A small frown lodged between his eyebrows, Daniel walked beside his friend, feeling guilty about the fact he was anxious to go home. "I'll need to return. I don't think anything happened with Melosha but… Jack, I need to make sure. She was with me most of the time and I don't think anything…that I did anything…"
Jack came to an abrupt halt.
Daniel shot a look at Jack when an arm came sweeping up to stop his progress. He caught a peculiar look crossing Jack's face, something akin to self-disgust, which made Daniel wonder if something had happened to Jack.
Jack's next words were spoken softly: "You know what? If I say something that makes it pretty clear my mouth and my brain aren't connected, kick me, OK?"
Daniel raised his eyebrows and gave Jack a speaking look.
"Smart-ass."
"Sorry." Daniel watched with some concern as Jack started walking away from the stargate to sit on the steps of its platform. "Jack, we need to go before…" he trailed off, settling for waving his hand at the stargate.
"There'll be another one along in a minute."
"We don't have a GDO."
"Carter gave me the GDO."
"Why did she do that?"
"Because she's smarter than me. Daniel: sit."
Casting one final look at the event horizon, Daniel wandered over to Jack and sat down beside him. He ducked his head, busying himself with scratching at his head and wondering if the Touched carried fleas or lice.
"So…"
"So… Why did you say what you…said? Just now. About kicking you. You know. That."
Jack sighed and rubbed a hand across his head, wondering if there was some kind of insect life or plant he was allergic to. Damn if he wasn't scratching like a dog.
Daniel, you dog.
Ah hell. One of these days he was going to learn how to think before he said the first dumb thing that popped into his mouth.
"Just something I said I'd rather forget. Look. I'm taking you back home, get you checked out by the doc. As soon as she gives the OK we'll come back and check on Melosha. Right now she's with her folks and I think you should be with yours."
Daniel pulled a face. "Jack, I don't have any…"
"What am I? Chopped liver?"
"Oh. Oh!" Daniel gaped at Jack for a moment until he realized the other man was looking embarrassed, despite his best attempts to hide the fact. He closed his mouth with a snap and had to blink several times, striving for control; he hadn't realized just how close to the surface his feelings were. "Thanks, Jack."
Jack dug the toe of his right boot into the earth. "Sure. You know, it just occurred to me you were out there by yourself and you didn't have painkillers. That must have been pretty tough. You wanna talk about it?"
The sound of the wormhole disengaging broke the brief silence as Daniel seriously considered the offer. He cast aside his first thought which was to regard Jack's offer as merely a token not meant to be accepted. Jack O'Neill might like to be thought of as a hardass but the man was generous, warm and had a kindness that could make recently roughed-up archaeologists want to cry against that broad shoulder that had pressed up against his own in invitation.
Discreetly rubbing his eyes to hide his reaction but blowing it completely by giving a moist sniff, Daniel gave a smile, quick and dazzling. "Maybe later?"
"My place? I…have some apologizing to do. Over beer. I say sorry so much better if I have a beer in my hand."
Daniel scratched his head vigorously. "OK. I don't like beer that much."
"You love beer. Everyone likes beer. Come on, Danny. Let's get you home."
Jack got to his feet then put out a hand to haul up his friend. "Dial us home?"
Daniel did the honors, taking a small pleasure from the simple act of pressing the glyphs, knowing they meant a return to safety and security.
And coffee.
The wormhole burst forth, the event horizon sweeping out then stabilizing. Jack typed in the code into the GDO then looked across at his friend.
"Time to go home."
A hand reached across, ruffling Daniel's hair.
Daniel opened his mouth to voice a warning then figured it was too late and gave a Jack-like smirk.
Together, they headed toward the gate.
Not alone. Thank God, he wasn't alone.
-fin-